Barbie or Bond, Barbie or Bond?

MysteryGirl! dug up a completely random quiz recently to determine how gay you might be, and I scored disturbingly low. Not because I really, really enjoy the opposite sex, but because of other characteristics. I think the problem was that it was scoring me for lesbianism, when really I'm much more of a gay man.

Or maybe not, given my evening the other night.

This is not a sexy story.

I had a nasty week and a rotten day and travel plans for the weekend, so I decided to lay low at the MegLair on Friday night. As I was driving home from work and pondering my options, a ray of light symbolizing inspiration blinded me temporarily. What would make me happy, I realized, was a night alone with pizza, beer, and action movies.

I screeched into the nearest blockbuster and grabbed Batman Begins and the new Bond, Casino Royale. Of course I saw them both in the theater, but I loved them both a great deal and thought they would hold up well for another viewing. A six pack of Liberty Ale and a thin crust meat lovers pizza later, I was home wearing a tank top and yoga pants, hair in a ponytail, and cracking my favorite bottled beer.

Midway through Batman Begins I had the realization that this was probably not a blissful evening for all women. I was grinning like an idiot all night, though. If I'd had a dick, I probably would have had my hand down my pants. As it was I rocked out to Christian Bale's Batman (delish), tried to ameliorate my burping skills with Liberty, and ate a lot of damn pizza. I spent more time fast forwarding chunks of Casino Royale, or just revisiting that first chase scene in the construction site. DAMN that's a fine film.

I think a lot of pleasure came from my intense desire for some alone time. But the rest was definitely pure delight in action films, excellent beer, and tasty pizza. For one night I could care less about my weight, my appearance, or my alleged personality. Didn't even think about it. Makes a girl wonder about switching teams. Just once in a while. Barbie Rules.