Trust me, I'm a doctor

Election Day in a Red State. A Democratic gubernatorial (goobernatorial, really--hahaha Georgia humor!) candidate who apparently had no issues to call his own. A rainy Tuesday in November. Yet, as I stood in line to cast my vote, I still thought, "this is awesome."

Then I got to the ballot. Like most of you, I had to vote on several amendments. However, a few of them were almost completely incomprehensible. I have a doctorate in the English language (although you can't always tell given how fast I write these little morsels, I know) and I had to stand in the faux booth and perform a goddamn close reading on one of these suckers. It was an amendment to ban something in order that something else wouldn't happen. At one point I just started counting "not" to see whether the old mathematical principle of multiplying negatives held up.

"Well, if I don't want this to not happen, does that mean I want it to happen?"

I actually had a moment where I thought, "I need a Claven Voter Guide for Georgia." I'm a reasonably educated voter, here. I knew where I stood on farm subsidies, an amendment supporting hunting and fishing, subsidized housing for the surviving spouses of cops and firefighters killed on the job, and so on. This one was harder. I have to confess I tried pretty hard to research my issues before voting (not so easy outside the beltway, fyi! I got spoiled in DC!), but this one got past me.

I went to teach afterwards, squishing into class in my wet shoes, and went ahead with my policy of offering extra credit points to students who voted. One of my kids asked me what I thought of the aforementioned amendment, and I made some crack about my PhD meaning nothing in the voting booth. He nodded enthusiastically and said, "Dr. Megarita, if you can't make heads or tails of this thing, and I'm having trouble and I'm a senior majoring in English, what is everyone else doing?" The wisecracking girl across the room said "skipping it or faking it." The boy shook his head and said, "that's just wrong. I'm going to write someone."

Of course I was ecstatic that one of my students had been infected with my political fervor--such as it is--but then I offered up for consideration Jefferson et al's belief that only the educated classes would be/should be voting anyhow. Had that changed with increased enfranchisement? Or are those of us who apparently can't parse poorly written amendments to an ungrammatical constitution simply faking a kind of ghetto democracy while those "in the know" got to make the real change?

Voting still rules, even though my vote went straight in the garbage. I'd like to give a big HOORAY to Maryland, too, who pulled out the Democratic goodness in the Senate AND in the race for cutest governor. I luv O'Malley.